Today, I would like to invite all members of Guiding, to talk about the realness of Mental Health.
I suffer from severe depression and anxiety. I have been fortunate to have found reassurance in attending my Pathfinder meetings and comfort in sharing in the sisterhood of Guiding. For a long time, I denied that I had an illness, telling myself to ‘just smile’ or ‘suck it up’, too embarrassed to even talk to my doctor about my inner suffering. My illness affected my day-to-day life – from my job to my relationship with those closest to me, especially my husband.
Coming to terms with my illness has not been easy. I have heard several painful comments, that add to the reason so many people go without seeking help, from “Just grow a thicker skin” to “Just pull yourself together”. Dealing with the negative stigmas associated with my illness has set my healing back. Fortunately, I have been surrounded by amazing friends, many who I gained through Guiding, and an incredibly patient and loving husband, who has taken the time to learn about mental illness and get support for himself – as dealing with my illness has been far from easy.
Many people have commented that if I had cancer they would know how to help me. But I don’t have cancer. I have depression. And just like a person suffering from any illness, I just need those close to me to love me and support me and be there for me – even when it isn’t easy and it isn’t pretty. That’s all the help I need from you.
So I invite you, to talk to your girl members, talk to your sisters in Guiding and especially talk to someone who you might suspect is suffering in silence. And if you need someone to talk to, I’m here.
Some statistics from the Canadian Medical Association taken from www.letstalk.bell.ca
- 1 in 5 Canadians will suffer some form of mental illness in their lives.
- 2 in 3 suffer in silence, fearing rejection or judgement
- Only 49% of Canadians said they would socialize with friends who has a serious mental illness
- At any given time, almost 3 million Canadians have serious depression
- For those who seek help and get treatment, a difference is made in 80% of people with depression, allowing them to get back to their regular activities.
Guest blogger Amber
By guest blogger Amber Wiegand. Amber is an active and passionate member of Guiding. She works with Guides, Pathfinders and Rangers. She is currently a District Commissioner and Area Program and International Advisor. She just received a Queen’s Diamond Jubilee Medal from Girl Guides of Canada.
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Amber, thank you for sharing your story! Thank you for also commenting on Guidings positive impact on your quality of life! We tend to forget that amongst the many positive things that Guiding is, it is also about community and friends – and healthy communities mean healthy people! DB-
In 2008 I was hospitalised with depression. It changed my whole life and brought me on a very different path than what I initially planned for myself. When I was sick I left GG because I didn’t want people to think of me as ill. When I returned to a general event, I had very mixed greetings. As nobody knew why I had gone, I couldn’t be upset with anyone for not asking if I was okay but what did hurt was that after 15 years of being a GG, people thought I had abandoned them. To this day, most of my GG family don’t know what happened. In retrospect, I should have voiced it but for some reason I just didn’t want them to know. The severity of my depression made me a different person and it was not someone that my GG family knew…it wasn’t someone I wanted them to know. I think it’s incredibly important to talk about mental health because as you said, you can’t see the pain but I can assure you that it is there.
I am a Guide guider and a district commissioner, and yet somehow, with the help of an amazing team of women, find the strength to continue in those roles, despite being agoraphobic. People need to open up about their mental illnesses otherwise how are people to know? How are they to understand what we’re going threw if we don’t tell them. The more we share, the more light we bring to it, the more help we can bring to those who suffer in silence. Thank you for sharing your story.
, we do this because we beileve in Guiding and what it can provide for the girls, we want to avoid having the girls lose interest because they are bored. We need to know! Talk to your guider, but before you do, talk to your daughter and ask her more questions: What do you find boring? What could make it more interesting? Bring that information to your conversation. Also, consider helping to prepare and/or participate in a special activity for your daughter’s group. It may be just what your guider needs to help kick things into the next level.
Thank you for sharing. I am a guider with a ranger unit and we’ve had two girls from our group hospitalized in the last few months with anxiety/depression issues. They are both doing well and the support they have been given by the other rangers in our group and the courage the girls have shown in sharing their personal experiences with these issues has probably made them all grow as individuals more than any single activity we have shared together. I am amazed at the understanding and the consideration that the girls are showing towards each other. Tough times, tough topics, but as usual the girls take the lead and show me they are strong, resourceful young women that will surely make a difference in their communities.
Thank you, Amber, for sharing your story. I wish more people felt comfortable sharing their stories and experiences; or just lending an ear or a shoulder to cry on to those who need it.
Thank you for sharing your story. Your story could be mine. During my 7 year struggle I always knew I had the greatest friends from Guiding who have seen me struggle thru this fight. I find everyday a struggle and want to win. I have still not found medication to work that does not have serious side effects I have just finished 5 years as Area Commissioner, now deputy. area Commissioner and have the best women to work with plus a great Alberta provincial council who watched me struggle. Thank you for sharing your story. Everyone must remember not all disabilities are visual.
Thank you so much for sharing your story Amber; now I have another reason to admire you! I am a Guide/Pathfinder Guider and as a result of a very horrible childhood and genetics, I have suffered severe depression, anxiety and even bi-polar/MPD disorder for a period that saw me suicidal and hospitalized. I still battle this disease everyday (suicidal thoughts are few and far between thankfully, though not gone forever) and probably always will. These are things that I never want to share with anyone as I fear they wil never regard me the same way again. My greatest fear is to be seen by others as the huge failure and disappointment that I feel myself to be. Or perhaps they will judge me unfit to be a mentor to the wonderful girls in Guiding. Or worse, what will my disease do to my own beautiful daughters? What if my girls knew the real me? Would they still hold me in such high regard? I can only try…and try harder…to be the best person I can and Guiding helps with that. Now knowing that fellow Guiders are suffering too, maybe I can help other Guiders and girls with this struggle as well, which will help me too.
Thank you so much for sharing your story! I am a sparks/brownie leader and I too have suffered from severe anxiety which brought on an onset of mild depression. For a while it was a huge struggle to get through life’s most simple tasks. Many of us can relate that there is no “cure” and it will never go away but how we manage it is the key. It is encouraging when you read stories from a brave person such as yourself “who put it all out there”. The one positive note is that we more often than not we can recognize when someone is experiencing symptoms of depression and or anxiety because sure enough we have had them ourselves. I have kept it mostly to myself and very close friends and family but your right that we need to start spreading the importance of the message. I have never told any fellow guiders but I think it is time that I start. Chances are there will probably be someone else who has experienced it too but hasn’t said anything either. Time to open up the lines of communication